Happy Happy Birthday Shelby!!!

12 years ago, I had my first baby girl. I always wanted a baby named Shelby, ever since I was little, and I was so happy to get her. She was born 4 weeks early, and even though we wanted her to stay put and grow big and healthy, my typical Shelby wouldn't let anyone tell her what to do. She had trouble breathing, and soon they whisked her away in what felt like seconds since they put her in my arms. They got my settled into my post partum room, and then I got the call from the NICU. She had to be placed on a ventalator. I remember going into the bathroom, shutting the door, and just falling to pieces. My baby was sick! I was so scared and felt like I had to of been at fault. The nurses heard me from out at the nurses desk. I didn't realilize I was almost screaming. My blood pressure shot up, and a bunch of nurses came in and tried to calm me down. They gave me something to help me sleep, and when I woke up my eyes were so swollen I could hardly see. I went straight to the NICU and was shocked at how many wires and tubes she had coming out of her. I felt like a horrible mother, and I hadn't even started with her yet. She had all the pokes from needles and had to go through so much pain, and I wasn't even there to hold her little hand. I didn't get to talk into her ear and whisper "mamas here".
When she was 3 days old I got to hold her again. She got stronger and went through every check list the doctors had. She had to learn to suck, swollow, and breath. She was the biggest baby in the NICU. There were these tiny 3 pound babies in there, and then Shelby at 7 lbs 12 oz. She looked so big to all the nurses, but so tiny to me. When she was 11 days old she got to come home. She had an alarm I had to have hooked up to her at all times to let me know if stopped breathing. Thankfully, the 2 times it went off was when Colby unplugged the cord. She grew and grew and just got stronger and smarter. She always had her blond hair in a hair bow. Her aunt Kimmie bought her hairbows every time she went to a store. She stuck to me like glue. When she first started talking every single sentence would end with huh mama. Huh mama. Huh mama.
Now, she's 12. I like to hang out with her. She's funny. She cracks me up. She likes dumb jokes, and can find humor in almost anything. She is so unique, and I love that. So today, on 9-10-11 she actually is 12. What a cool date huh? I have enjoyed watching her grow and change, but it's so bittersweet letting go of her childhood and watching her grow into a young woman. People tell me, don't be sad, you've got all these other younger kids still. They just don't get it. I only have 1 Shelby. I could have 50 kids, and there would still only be 1 Shelby.